Love Doctor on a Mission
by jessiej1993
Summary: Inuyasha cheats on Kagome again and she is angrier than ever. So what now? I can help! What happens when Inuyasha messes up something as simple as giving someone flowers? Did you ever give anyone a note? Inuyasha did too...read to find out what happens. r
1. the gift of flowers

-1**Narrator**: Are you stubborn? You can't admit that your wrong….ever? And no matter what…you have trouble saying I love you?

**Inuyasha: **Well hey! When you say it like that…

**Narrator:** Seriously you need some help….let me help you with your relationship problems and…

**Inuyasha: **WHAT RELATIONSHIP?! WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SECOND BASE YET!

**Narrator: **That doesn't mean that you don't love each other….anyway…are you just gonna sit here like a bump on a log and let your woman be mad at you forever?

**Inuyasha: **Well…actually she has a right to be mad at me….

**Narrator:** Oh hell no! Don't tell me your guilty now for laying your hands on that walking corpse?

**Inuyasha: **SHHH! Why'd you tell everyone ya big mouth? Now I'm gonna get angry fan letters again!

**Narrator: **Hey everybody Inuyasha made-out with Kikyo! And then he was so stupid he let Kagome find them and then…

**Inuyasha; **Why….you…if you don't shut up….I WILL BRAKE EVERY BONE IN YOUR PITIFUL BLONDE HEADED HUMAN BODY!!!

**Narrator: **Umm…I know…your thanking me already because I am such a wonderful person. You just have trouble saying things like that…wait a minute what are you doing? Is that Tetsuaiga? Did it just transform? AHHHH!!

**Strategy 1: **After calming Inuyasha down and escaping death I explained one of the easiest ways for someone like him to say that he loves this "person" who is mad at him and that he is sorry. This is called the flower strategy. Flowers are beautiful and appealing to the female eye. Giving someone flowers is one way to say that you are sorry. Whenever you see a guy walk out of the flower store with a bouquet of flowers it obviously means he did something wrong and he bought them for his girlfriend. I told Inuyasha to pick out flowers himself because he would know what Kagome would like. Lets see what the result is….

IN THE FEUDAL ERA: Inuyasha walked to the well with a handful of wildflowers in his hand. He had a big smile on his face. He jumped down the well and climbed out. He walked up to Kagome's house, placed the flowers at the door step, rang the door bell and ran. Kagome opened the door and looked around. She didn't see anyone so she looked down and saw beautiful flowers at her feet. Kagome was so delighted she bent down to pick them down and….

"OUCH!!"

BACK TO ME AND INUYASHA:

**Narrator: **Inuyasha?

**Inuyasha: **What…

**Narrator:** Let me see your hand please.

**Inuyasha: **Ok…fine..

**Narrator: **What's that?

**Inuyasha: **What's what?

**Narrator: **Those red marks on your hand.

**Inuyasha: **I don't know…

**Narrator: **There was thorns on those flowers…I wonder how you got all those little cuts on your hand…

**Inuyasha: **I guess I didn't feel it.

**Narrator:** Didn't…feel…thorns piercing YOUR FUCKING HAND?!

**Inuyasha:** I'm not all human like you.

**Narrator:** You can't tell me that you can't feel pain on your hand….it's just impossible..

**Inuyasha: **Ouch! YOUR CRUSHING MY HAND! STOP!!

**Narrator: **I, the love doctor will not be made a fool of with an example of an idiot pupil like you! YOU HEAR ME?!

**Inuyasha:** Yes, Master. Can you let go of my hand now?

**Narrator: **Sure…and keep up the Master thing. I like it.


	2. the LoVe note

-1**Narrator:** Well Inuyasha…..what have we learned?

**Inuyasha: **Take the thorns off flowers before you give them away.

**Narrator: **Also, I will be staying with you and watch every move you make so you don't mess up again.

**Inuyasha: **Can't I have some privacy? I mean what if she forgives me and we start…touchy feely…

**Narrator: **Don't push it I doubt she'd do that with a jerk like you….anyway you don't have much experience so Im'a stay wit you so you don't screw that up too.

**Inuyasha: **Hey wasn't the point of this to make me a better person…for Kagome to love me for who I am and not hate me for being a jerk.

**Narrator: **The way it's going now….it don't seem so good. So anyway lets get this started.

**Strategy 2: **Ok….here's how this goes. A note. Yes simply a note. You write down your feelings and how sorry you are. This is how you express these things that you can't do because you must have never been taught how to say sorry. Writing it on paper is much easier.

The letter:

_Dear Kagome,_

_I am truly sorry for what I have done. I have realized my mistake and I wish for forgiveness. Give me another chance because I love you like no other guy does. It may not seem like it but it's true. Please forgive me…please._

_Your love,_

_Inuyasha_

**Narrator: **See isn't that nice? Lucky I wrote it for you.

**Inuyasha: **Yeah yeah. She'll like it.

**Narrator: **Ok before we go back Im'a stop at the hot springs. Stay here and don't get into trouble.

**Inuyasha: **Whatever.

10 MINUTES LATER

**Narrator: **Let's get going, Inuyasha.

**Inuyasha: **Fine.

THE RESULT: Inuyasha rang the bell of the Higurashi house. Kagome answered and she slammed the door in his face.

"Kagome! C'mon open this door now!" Inuyasha banged on the door.

"What do you want ya big jerk?" he shoved the paper in her face and she took it. She unfolded it and began reading. Kagome's face started turning bright red. "FUCKING PERVERT!! SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT!"

BACK TO ME AND INUYASHA:

**Narrator:** May I ask you why you gotten your face buried in the ground?

**Inuyasha: **Uh…your corny love letter did it.

**Narrator: **Excuse me it wasn't corny! Every girl would fall for mushy stuff like that and no girl unless she was on crack would call you a pervert! Hey wait a minute….

**Inuyasha: **On no…now it's my fault again right?

**Narrator:** Miroku get over here!

**Miroku: **What is it and why have you been following Inuyasha around all day?

**Narrator: **Well…Inuyasha needs some help with romance. Speaking of romance…did you help him with something recently…maybe writing a note…or a letter…

**Miroku:** Yes, he made me fix up dis cheesy love letter. All women love me so obviously whatever I write on paper they would love.

**Narrator: **Umm…Miroku? Do you not see Inuyasha's face? It's so swollen his head looks like a fucking balloon.

**Inuyasha: **Shut up!

**Narrator: **No you shut up! You're the idiot that let this idiot help you!

**Inuyasha:** Skinny bitch.

**Narrator: **What was that?

**Inuyasha: **I said…SKINNY BITCH!

**Narrator:** Oh….oh no you starting wit the wrong bitch.

**Inuyasha: **Oh yeah? Well whatcha gonna do about it? Hey those beads look just like mine….AHH!

**Narrator: **SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT! And don't come out until your gonna apologize to me!


	3. Say Sorry

-1**Inuyasha: **I'm….I'm…sss….

**Narrator:** C'mon say it. It's good practice.

**Inuyasha**: I'm sorry…

**Narrator:** I didn't hear you…what did you say?

**Inuyasha: **I am sorry.

**Narrator: **ONE more time.

**Inuyasha: **I'M SORRY!

**Narrator: **See that wasn't that bad now was it?

**Inuyasha:** Guess not…

**Narrator: **Hey look Kagome's back. Now why don't we try saying sorry? C'mon you just did it!

**Inuyasha: **Fine….

RESULT: Inuyasha walked in front of Kagome. She tried to walk around him but he got in her way again.

"Kagome….I have to tell you something…" Inuyasha stated.

"What is it?" Kagome asked with an attitude while crossing her arms and tapping her foot.

"I…I…a…m…."

"And? Yes?"

"Hold on a sec, dammit! As I was saying, I am.."

"Hey I was talking to you nicely. Why did you have to go and give me an attitude!" Kagome shouted at the top of her lungs. She then slapped him and walked pasted him in the direction of Kaede's village.

BACK TO ME AND INUYASHA:

**Narrator: **Well, well, well. What did we learn?

**Inuyasha:** All women are bitches….

**Narrator: **WRONG! Women don't like attitudes. You could have answered her a lil' nicer than that….also why did you have trouble saying sorry?

**Inuyasha: **I don't know…

**Narrator:** Well…we have to work on that.

Ok ppl…that's it for this chapter. Reviews please! Lol.


	4. finally dead

**Inuyasha: **I don't get it! How do I always screw up…I messed up three times.

**Narrator:** Don't worry. Three times isn't a lot. Well actually I can't come up with any other ways to say sorry but…

**Inuyasha:** Well dam! What kind of love doctor are ya huh? You should have a whole book on this junk.

**Narrator: **Umm….umm…hey look, it's Kikyo! You know what this means?

**Inuyasha: **Holy shit not again! Hide me before I do something stupid.

**Narrator: **You know what dis means?

**Inuyasha: **What?

**Narrator: **You have to turn Kikyo down in front of Kagome.

**Inuyasha: **How's dat possible?

**Narrator: **You tell her you love another and that you want to move one. And make sure you tell her she how much you hate her.

**Inuyasha: **I don't hate her….

**Narrator: **In that case…I'll tell you what to say. Say, you are an ugly, dead, clay pot that can't compare to the beauty of the maiden Kagome, who is ALIVE and well. Is that good?

**Inuyasha: **I'll try…

RESULT: Inuyasha approached Kikyo unobtrusively, trying not to attract his friends attention but all eyes were on him. Kagome watched every move he made, which made Inuyasha feel like her eyes were burning a hole through his skin. He walked in front of Kikyo and looked her in the eyes.

"Kikyo, I have to tell you this before it's to late. I love ano….you. I want to move o….in with you!" Inuyasha stumbled on his words and just couldn't get the guts to tell her that he loved Kagome. All of the sudden the was a gun shot and Kikyo was on the ground moaning.

"Sorry Kikyo, just had to. In my opinion, Inuyasha deserves to live rather than get dragged down into hell with you. Besides, this just making my job so much easier!" I exclaimed happily twirling the gun on my finger. All of the sudden Inuyasha turned around. His eyes were red and his claws looked sharper than usual. "Umm…nice doggy….good doggy….Inuyasha…"

"SIT!" Kagome shouted. "Thanks for killing Kikyo. I was about to buy a shot gun the other day to do that but I didn't have enough money. Where did you get that anyway?" Kagome asked me.

"Oh my friend knows a guy who knows a guy that's in the bloods gang." I replied.

"Aren't the bloods in America?"

"Yup. So…"

"Will you two stop chatting! Someone is dead…don't you think it's wrong or sad in anyway?" Inuyasha jumped up with Kikyo in his arms, tears streaming down his face.

"Nahh, not really." Kagome said.

"Inuyasha, your heart will move on! Proof of that…is Kagome!"

"We know your going to miss Kikyo but now it's time to move on. Anyway, it would have never worked out." Miroku said in a voice sounding very serious and emotionally supportive.

"Everybody can understand what your going through, Inuyasha. You've lost a loved one. I lost my whole family." Sango added.

"Oh…c'mon!" Inuyasha dropped Kikyo, "Why is everyone feeling sorry for me?"

"Because we understand." I replied, "Lets go burry Kikyo now and you could start over."

Nope not the end yet….lets leave ya at a hanger.


	5. THE END

-1**Narrator: **So how does it feel now that Kikyo is 10 feet under?

**Inuyasha: **Aren't you only supposed to burry someone 6 feet under?

**Narrator: **Oh…well…she's special.

**Inuyasha: **I guess I'll be ok.

**Narrator: **Well why don't you go by Kagome?

**Inuyasha: **Fine…

Inuyasha walks up to Kagome from behind. He sits next to her and looks her in the eyes while placing his hand on hers. He leaned in to kiss her but she turned her head.

"Inuyasha, why?" Kagome question with her head turned, avoiding eye contact.

"What do you mean why?" he replied with a confused look on his face.

"Are you only here…beside me because there is no one else left? Kikyo is gone now. That's why right?"

"No, I've always loved you Kagome. It's just that it is so hard to move on from my past…..I realized Kikyo and I could not be lovers due to our differences." You could then here someone is the background screaming "Living dead kinky ho" which Kagome and Inuyasha both ignored.

"Well guys can be like that. I understand." Kagome answered understandingly. She leaned in the kiss him and their lips met. They passionately kissed for about 2 minutes and then parted. Finally, Inuyasha loved Kagome and only her. And we can say this is happily ever after….lets leave it at that.

THE END…..to a crappy story that I only had one person that left me reviews….U ALL HATE ME! lol


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